Twelfth Star [Should be private, but Tir is a tard]

[heavenfang]

...did he really admit what I think he did? I mean, he was sick, so it could just be skewed because of that, but...

He said he liked how I look with the bandanna off and my long hair...like the same way Kasumi did, but he actually SAID it to me. He had the boldness to do that...

Does that mean he...likes me? The same way Kasumi did?

This is so confusing...I don't know what to do or how to feel. I've never been through anything like this before. I mean, I know there are guys out there who...like other guys like that but...I'm not one of them. At least I don't think I am. And I never would have guessed he was.

My head hurts...

AND YOU CAN SHUT UP RIGHT NOW!

((that last part was directed at his Rune, which is taunting him in his mind right now))

Comments

[comment log]

[ilpresto.livejournal.com]

"What else would I be doing?" he asked, at the same time moving Tir's hands so he could see where he was hurt.

"Oh, ouch," Kazuki hissed, and winced in sympathy, that was certainly going to leave a mark, "you're gonna need to ice that."

[comment log]

[tenkai-soul.livejournal.com]

"Well I certainly wouldn't know!" Tir stuttered in response, preferring to come off as prudish than to ever admit to manipulating himself, even to his partner. That was just perfectly sound in his own head.

"You could probably just as easily bag some snow from the windowsill..."

[comment log]

[ilpresto.livejournal.com]

"...You're kidding, right?" All guys did, that was just a fact of life...

"That's a good idea," he muttered to himself, getting up "Hold still, okay? I'll go do that."

[comment log]

[tenkai-soul.livejournal.com]

What a day...Tir couldn't help but curl up into himself, just sitting in the small hallway feeling like dog that had just been caught eating off the table.

It was humiliating...for them both really...But the image was still in his mind. And he admitted, but only to himself, well...that he liked what he had scene. In a carnal manner, of course...

[comment log]

[ilpresto.livejournal.com]

Soon, Kazuki returned with an old plastic bag full of snow, with a towel wrapped around it. Too much cold at once would just make it hurt worse. He nudged Tir's shoulder gently to tell him he was there, and placed the pack in front of him.

He was embarrassed beyond embarrassment- after all this was over, he was going to go to his room and have a nice, calming mental breakdown- but he still had enough lucidity to be himself for a few moments before losing it.

"Hey, Tir, s'ok..."

[comment log]

[tenkai-soul.livejournal.com]

"N-no...it can't be okay...not after what I just did...I can't...I can't apologize enough," Tir spoke in a low, almost broken voice as he placed the snow bag against his head, wincing at the contact.

[comment log]

[ilpresto.livejournal.com]

"H-hey!" Kazuki stammered, he couldn't stand to hear that kind of sad voice from Tir, "It... It's not that bad. I mean, you already knew, and... Um, you were in my lap just a couple of minutes ago, it's not like I have a problem with it..."

Okay, that was kind of a lie, but he supposed he'd get used to it eventually?

[comment log]

[tenkai-soul.livejournal.com]

"...but even then...," Tir let out a heavy sigh. This was surprisingly difficult to say.

"I'm a fool, Kazuki. I don't know the first thing about what I'm doing with this. I should have known better. And on top of it all you ASKED to be left alone. I'm an idiot when it comes to things like this...totally lost."

[comment log]

[ilpresto.livejournal.com]

"And you think I'm not?"

Kazuki was laughing under his breath. "Tir, I've told you I've never had... Someone like that before. That kiss? I had no idea what I was doing. Seriously."

"...Although," he amended a moment later, "I am kind of surprised you didn't know what I was... well, what I was in the bathroom for. I thought it was pretty obvious."

[comment log]

[tenkai-soul.livejournal.com]

While the first part certainly was comforting, the second statement only further served to drive the humiliation in. Sure, it was obvious to a NORMAL person. But outside of Pahn's joking, that sort of thing just...never came up in his life. And Cleo was usually swift to silence Pahn if he went too far.