heavenfang | Twelfth Star [Should be private, but Tir is a tard]

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Twelfth Star [Should be private, but Tir is a tard]

...did he really admit what I think he did? I mean, he was sick, so it could just be skewed because of that, but...

He said he liked how I look with the bandanna off and my long hair...like the same way Kasumi did, but he actually SAID it to me. He had the boldness to do that...

Does that mean he...likes me? The same way Kasumi did?

This is so confusing...I don't know what to do or how to feel. I've never been through anything like this before. I mean, I know there are guys out there who...like other guys like that but...I'm not one of them. At least I don't think I am. And I never would have guessed he was.

My head hurts...

AND YOU CAN SHUT UP RIGHT NOW!

((that last part was directed at his Rune, which is taunting him in his mind right now))

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"It's like... It's almost like Kaho-chan all over again," he admitted, somewhat painfully. Kazuki had been hopelessly attached to her, and incredibly devoted, despite the fact that her eyes always seemed to be on someone other than him. To talk about it like this made him feel as though he was breaking the promise he had made to himself, to become a better musician, a better man, one that she could notice on her own.

But Tir... He already had his full attention. Kazuki would be lying to say that didn't feel like what he always wanted. What she didn't... couldn't give him.

"I feel like," he exhaled deeply, and placed his forehead in his palms, "I feel like I like you. But I've never been that way... with a guy, before."

"W-well...neither have I," Tir admitted, though he felt like it was the hundredth time he'd said that today and Kazuki was just the last to hear it. So much had happened so quickly...he couldn't imagine what the other youth must be thinking.

Tir's own thoughts...they went to Kasumi. There was a time when he was certain they could be together...but Kasumi could never get past who Tir was. Tir's status...his legend...his rune...they all held him back before.

But none of those seemed to matter to Kazuki. Kazuki wasn't from his world, and the name McDohl meant nothing to him. He'd already promised to not leave him be, in spite of the rune. And...well...Tir's status as a hero didn't seem to intimidate him either. It was really a blessing.

How could he turn that away? It was what he wanted, after all...he just always imagined it would be from a girl.

Kazuki couldn't bear the silence, it was so heavy. He felt stifled enough as it was.

"In my world, it's not like it's that uncommon, but it's like it never even occurred to me, that people around me... or even myself, might be that way. I never thought about it."

"S-same here. I don't think I've ever met anyone who's...like that," Tir stuttered. What a great replacement for silence; awkward conversation. Tir felt almost mortified. How was he to go about this?

"Kazuki, I...I think I like you...that way."

"I... kind of figured, with this talk and all" what else would it be about? "I mean, I've seen you blush at times, and... You've probably seen me too, huh?" The day he was sick came to mind, especially. That was pretty bad.

"S-so now we just...need to decide if it's worth it, right? I mean...liking each other that way...or however you do this," Tir fidgeted, but still managed a hopeful smile.

Wow, Tir was really NO good at this sort of thing.

Really now? Well, neither is Kazuki.

"...I guess? I told you before, I think, I've never... Had a girlfriend, boyfriend," okay, that felt indescribably weird to say, "I'm really, uh, inexperienced is probably the right word."

"I...never really had one either. I mean...Kasumi was the closest I ever got, and that...wasn't much, in hindsight, ha ha," Tir laughed nervously.

The next words that came out of his mouth were perhaps the most courageous thing this war hero had ever managed to choke out of his poor little chest.

"Do you...want to try it?"

Kazuki had been pushed so far out of his comfort zone he was in danger of falling off of the outer cliffs of complete insecurity.

But that's how this sort of thing usually goes, isn't it?

"I, um," there were butterflies flitting around in his chest to excitedly, he couldn't help but smile a little, "I... I think I'd like to, Tir."

Tir...couldn't describe the feeling that washed over him. It was a mix of relief and something more...something warm and exciting all at once. Whatever it was, it felt amazing.

"Th-...thank you Kazuki. I...," nope. Words weren't going to do him any good here. Actions would do just fine though, he thought...

Gently, he set down his tea and moved over to Kazuki, his movements swift but still somehow strained under all that had been exchanged. When he finally reaches his...partner? Was that the term? Either way, when he reached Kazuki, he moved to lean before him, an ungloved hand caressing against Kazuki's cheek...

And then, he pressed their lips together in a kiss that wasn't made under any sort of pretense...other than to show his appreciation.

Kazuki's cheeks prickled with heat as Tir spoke, and he looked down and away. Embarrassment was an understatement, but it was a happy feeling. It was hopeful and kind, and very relaxing, as if whatever walls that were between them before had just crumbled away. He didn't have to be worried anymore.

"You don't need to..." he protested feebly, but lost his voice when he felt Tir's hand touch the side of his face. His toes curled with anticipation, there was only so much one could do with a gesture like that, but he still made a small sound of surprise when their lips touched.

It was certainly pleasurable, better than their first under the mistletoe since he had the presence of mind to think about what was going on unabashed. He wasn't sure what to do with himself, Kazuki had a feeling he should be doing something back, holding Tir in some way, maybe, but his hands were full. He made do with making his body language as open as possible to show that it was okay, and he was accepting of whatever advances Tir made.

There were a remarkable amount of differences between the kiss they shared then and the one from the mistletoe. Chief amongst them was the fact that he had liberty to enjoy it this time. And it was...well, it was great. Little shocks and chills shot through his body as they connected. And the very fact that he enjoyed it, well...that probably sealed it in his mind. This was okay. There was nothing wrong with this.

It was...right.

He squirmed a little, feeling suddenly antsy and energetic as Tir kissed him. Kazuki wanted to reciprocate somehow, but he was unsure as to how he should go about it. His fingers twitched around his mug, he needed to put it down.

One hand moves to remove his bandanna while another takes the mug from Kazuki's hands. He needed to make room for what he did next...straddling Kazuki and taking a seat right in his lap. He didn't feel like leaving, after all, or breaking the kiss.

Kazuki made a muffled yelp of surprise against Tir's lips as he moved in, closer than he'd ever really been with a person before. But even with his hands free, he didn't push him away, instead, his arms naturally snaked around Tir's lower back to keep him where he was.

He wasn't sure if he was doing this kiss thing correctly either, but he was giving it his best shot.

Tir had been winging it this entire time, but his body seemed to know what it wanted. And just being there...held by Kazuki in embrace...that felt better than anything he could think of. It wasn't long though, before he had to break this kiss just to breath.

"...wow," he said, a slight pant in his voice.

"Yeah..." Kazuki agreed breathlessly, licking his lips, taking the moment in. Just two months ago, if someone had told him that he would be kissing a guy, he would have looked at them funny and asked them to repeat themselves. But now...

Tentatively, he moved one hand up to stoke the side of Tir's cheek, and then tangle into his hair. He really did like his hair, black was actually a rarer color where he came from.

Tir let out a pleased sigh, leaning his head to Kazuki's touch. This was all so new, exciting, and wonderful to him. He'd really fallen in love...and it was amazing. It wasn't long before he craved that kiss once more, and just like that their lips were together again, taking in the heat of the moment.

"Mmmmhn," he moaned quietly into the kiss, stomach muscles tightening and forcing out his breath. Kazuki put his hand behind Tir's neck, and with both pulled him closer still... He wasn't thinking that he might come off as forceful or needy, he trusted the other enough to warm him if something was wrong.

In the back of his head there was a worrying thought, that being like this wasn't like him, that he was supposed to be gentle... But it felt so good.

Tir gasped slightly from the clenching, their bodies now flush together as they could be given the seating position. Even in the cold room, their heat was very much noticeable and Tir feared losing himself...and yet at the same time reveled in it. He was happy, excited, and in an odd manner hungry all at once. The kiss deepened still...

Two boys, not even twenty yet, hardly a kiss's experience between them...

Not to mention Kazuki was kind of sensitive to this sort of thing, and admittedly easily excitable.

It was bound to happen eventually.

His kiss slowed down rather abruptly, and his eyes went wide with mortification. He had to pull away. "I, um," he stammered, his attention starting to flit in random directions, anywhere but down, "I uh, I think..."

Oh sweet Lord, have mercy, don't make him say it.

Tir was a bit dissapointed, oddly, but he didn't let that stop him from paying absolute attention to Kazuki's apparent concern. Though he was a a bit confused at first...what was he taking about?

"What's wrong?" he asked in a whisper.

...And then he felt it.

"Oh...OH!"

"Y-yeah," he practically squeaked, shimmying backwards desperately, anything to get at least a little bit further away, "I think, maybe... we should take a break?"

Well if anything, this further proved the attraction, right?

"R-right, we probably shou-" Tir started...and then he noticed as Kazuki moved back that he too had a reason to be mortified. In such loose trousers as he wore, he hadn't noticed until the shifting on Kazuki's lap that it was there at all, but once he became aware of it...

He could hardly look Kazuki in the eye, and his face was the same shade of red as his tunic. He was glad for the length of his hair at the moment...the bangs did a wonderful job of hiding his face.

Kazuki waited for the rest of that sentence. When it never came, he realized Tir was having the same problem. He felt a little better about the situation, and little... Self satisfied? But also bad for his partner, for obvious reasons.

"If you could-- ah!" he gasped, and then winced, "If you could move-- uhnn, owww... These, these jeans are really tight!"

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[comment log] FFFFFFFFFFT

[comment log] you dirty minded fella you

[comment log] well, I almost had it right

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